【China Archives】

Merry Christmas,China Archives ya filthy animals.

It's that time of year again. You're permitted to huddle up on the couch — roast beast from Whoville in one hand, a moose-shaped mug of eggnog in the other — and watch a whole bunch of movies you saw at this exact time last year.

From The Santa Clauseto Home Alone and The Grinchto Jingle All the Way, these movies are the ones you know back to front. You probably routinely quote them out loud, to the detriment of your relationships.

And if it's not youannually weeping through Love Actuallyand The Holiday, or demanding someone listen to your pitch on Die Hardas the ultimate holiday movie, that person is definitely someone you know.

Here's a few gift ideas for that cotton-headed ninny muggins. Now, go easy on the Pepsi.

Kevin McCallister's battle plan

It's only onscreen for a hot minute, but Home Alone fans will know this blueprint well. Our hero Kevin McCallister maps out his defenses, strategically planning surprises for the Wet Bandits. And you can get a print on Etsy!

Pair it with a Little Nero's Pizza cap and you'll have a very merry Christmas, ya filthy animal.

Price:$14.14

This perfect Love Actually pillow

If you really love Christmas, come on and let it snow with this delightful Love Actuallypillow. Artist and designer Thom Kofoed illustrated one of the most iconic scenes from the film. It's now a pillow you can give to your own true love.

Price: From $34

A Christmas Vacation moose mug

Clark Griswold's beloved moose mugs from Christmas Vacationare really awkward to sip from, but damn, they're good movie merch. Featured in such scenes as Clark losing his damn nerve, these moose mugs should be filled with ice cold eggnog and served when the shit's about to hit the fan at your family holiday meal.

Price:$29.99

A sweet Gremlins pin

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One of the less obvious holiday movies, but nonetheless, Gremlinsis 10/10 yuletide fun. LA designer and illustrator Miranda Dressler created these delightful little pins featuring a Gremlin in a Santa hat. If you're giving it to a true fan of the film, pair it with one of her Gremlin greeting cards.

Price:$14.29

An Elf ugly Christmas sweater

What better outfit to snuggle up watching Elfin than this ugly Christmas sweater, emblazoned with one of the highly quotable movie's best lines. You'll find many, manyvariations on the Elf-themed UCS around the internet — just pick your favorite quote, add "sweater," and punch it into Google.

Price:$59.99

The Nightmare Before Christmas Monopoly

Monopoly fights are as strong a holiday tradition as pudding, so why not argue over a version inspired by Tim Burton's cult classic? This collector's edition of the classic, polarizing board game replaces the traditional boardwalk real estate with locations like Jack's Tower, Oogie Boogie's Casino, and Sally's Alley. Fine holiday fun.

Price:$39.95

Your very own Max

The Grinch's faithful sidekick Max was the key to the whole "stealing Christmas" operation and every Who in Whoville should know it. This adorable plush toy comes with a pair of removable reindeer antlers — the same faux-reindeer solution seen in the film. Plus, if you press his paw, his ears move up and down. Your giftee's shriveled heart may grow three sizes after seeing it.

Price:$24.99

An actual Turbo Man doll

Arnold Schwarzenegger fought tooth and nail and Sinbad to get his son a Turbo Man doll, and all you have to do is shell out your rent money. Made exclusively for Wal-Mart by Tiger Electronics for the release of Jingle All the Wayin 1996, this talking action figure is a rare find. You'll find a few on eBay for cheaper, but plenty are out of the packaging.

Price:$640 on Amazon, prices and condition vary on eBay

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